Ultimately, my ability not to worry is directly linked to the degree to which I trust Jesus.

Leeanne and I received a very special gift yesterday. Someone shouted us a night at a mystery hotel for our 18th Wedding Anniversary.

Mum and Dad looked after the kids and because we had an appointment in town at lunchtime, we actually had a good long time away.

We both commented about the feeling of the weight of life coming off our shoulders and how much we enjoyed just relaxing together.

After Leeanne drifted off to sleep, I enjoyed the chance to read a bit more of Dallas Willard’s “Divine Conspiracy.” I am finding the book extremely affirming and helpful, and will write a bit more about it in weeks to come I imagine. I have always enjoyed reading, but this year it has taken on an extra level of importance for me as I find myself in a place where I am needing to make sense of a very complex few years.

This morning what I was reading in Philippians 4 resonated at a new level of depth, partly as a result of what I was reading in Willard’s book, partly as a result of the last few years and partly as a result of having the space away with Leeanne to get a bit of perspective.

Philippians seems to be written by Paul not to fix anything that was particularly broken, but to prepare the little church for what was ahead of them. He was outlining what it actually means to follow the call of Jesus to seek first the Kingdom of God in the day to day complexity of life.

There were four things that stood out to me from chapter four this morning.

The first was a passage I have wrestled with more than most in the bible. In the Foundations course we usually do the Snyder bible study on Philippians 4:6-7 (see one of my previous reflections here) but today one phrase in the Message
hit me in a new way:

It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.

I realised that for me, Christ hadn’t displaced worry at the centre of my life, and particularly when the future isn’t clear, I can spend a lot of my time worrying about all sorts of things. It is a big call to say that Christ can displace worry but as I reflected I realised that worry is a clear statement that I don’t trust God to “make my paths straight” (Prov 3:23).

Paul probably assumed that others would react to his words in a similar way to me, so he goes on to explain how it actually works:

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:8-9)

He basically instructs the little church to take charge of their thinking, to make conscious choices about what they spend their time reflecting on, rather than just being a victim of circumstance. He then tells them to make choices about their behaviour based on what they had seen and heard from him… He was very clear that their changed thinking needed to result in changed behaviour.

As I reflected on that passage this morning, it was liberating but not really a new idea that I could choose my thinking. I realised that worry doesn’t just happen, I make a concious choice to allow it to happen, and I can make a concious choice to think about other things.

Paul goes on to share how all of this works for him:

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:11-13)

The difference between Paul’s approach and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is that Paul is not just thinking positively, he is trusting Jesus. Ultimately, my ability not to worry is directly linked to the degree to which I trust Jesus. Having this in mind today made a difference, and at a couple of points today when things weren’t going how I wanted them to, I was able to step back and think about my thinking and kind of “change the channel.” It made a difference.

I know the real spiritual battleground, at least for me, is not “out there,” but in my mind. I want to get better at examining the assumptions behind my thoughts and gradually trusting more.